A New Transitioner?

My colleague knows that I like to take pictures when we travel together but apparently she wasn't quite sure what I was capturing. She made some comment about resting her eyes on our early morning flight but hearing my camera going AND not knowing what (the heck) I was really doing. She admitted to wondering aloud (to me) whether I might be taking pictures of the back of her hair. I told her that I wouldn't do that. So, I had to reveal that I was actually taking pictures of myself. Here's how the rest of that conversation went:

Me: I am taking pictures of my hair. I have a hair blog so I post pictures to chronicle my hair's changes.

Her: Naaaaaaaaaaaw.

Me: No, really. I have a hair blog.

Her: No. (a kind of a long drawn out NO that conveyed her disbelief that I would maintain a blog.)

Me: Yes! This going from relaxed to natural is a really big deal to a black woman. It can be hard for some so I have a blog to inspire and encourage other black women to transition from relaxers.

Her: Hmmm. My hairdresser says that I don't really need a relaxer. (I was proud of myself when I avoided saying BUT I TOLD YOU THAT BEFORE, LADY!)

Me: He's right. You don't.

Her: That's what my recent hair cut was about. I just couldn't take it anymore. I'm going to stop relaxing. I decided that my color is more important to me than the relaxer.

Now . . . it took everything in my power not to scream HALLELUJAH, stomp my feet, clap my hands, grab her by the shoulders and kiss her on the mouth. (Well, not really but I think you know what I mean.) I was a teeny bit surprised that she shared her revelation with me like that after all of this time together and me encouraging (very gently) that she re-think her hair care. Frankly, I thought it would have been more of a bonding moment of celebration. LOL. But at last, at last, she has come around. After five months of gentle persuasion, my leading by example, dropping carefully placed hints, and her eyeing my hairdos (and often making it the center of attention during meetings), she seems ready to make a change. Can you imagine that? She's decided to transition and has taken the first step along that journey by cutting her above-shoulder length (damaged) hair.

The next hurdle is getting her to better embrace her hair. She insists that it is "straight and kinky." It is probably heat damaged, fine with a curl pattern that she has mistaken for not pretty. She insisted that her hair was straight so I asked her if she was talking about her hair at the root. She said yes. Then I asked if it might be possible that she would have to allow her hair to grow a little longer so that she might actually see the complete rotation of her curl pattern.

That statement caused a wide-eyes silence. Perhaps that had not occurred to her or her hairdresser. I was kinda surprised that she would think that her hair is actually straight. She's not Asian or Peruvian or any other typical Type 1 hair person. (I'm not saying that black people can't have straight hair . . . there is a family of three with straight up straight hair at my church! This is not what my colleague has . . . no way.) I've seen a pattern at her root so I know that she's got something going on up there. It'll be interesting to see how all of this unfolds.

When she shared with me how she really wanted her hair to be styled, I told her to ask her hairdresser about curly butters. "Curly butters?"

"Yes, curly butters." Her hair will probably respond better to something much lighter than a butter, though. She would be better served by a curling jelly but she won't fully grasp that . . . until she completely grows out her relaxer.

And that's still a few months away.